It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Randomize
