She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
