he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Can I color on your dick again?
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize