If that was your dad, he is hot
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
