Me too!
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
