Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
