its not stalking. its research.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
