Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
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