I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize