yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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