Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
