Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize