do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
