White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Randomize
