also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
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