nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
