I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
i barfeds in our rink
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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