who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Randomize
