Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
tonight lets celebrate not being married
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I love you. Go after that dick
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize