I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
