Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
He told me they were just razor bumps!
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize
