they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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