We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize