Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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