My hair reeks of homosexuality.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
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