the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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