But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
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