this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Randomize
