And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Randomize
