that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
