normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
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