well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize