come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
