god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
