You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
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