Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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