Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
