Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
