these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
