In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize
