I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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