Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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