Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize