I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Randomize
