I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
