i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
