i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
