My room smells like vodka and shame
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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