Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize