I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
She's just so happy...and so naked.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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