He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
